personal, random, thoughts, written

alleviate

 

There are daysā€”like thisā€”when I wish my hugs would be enough to make you feel better, when my kisses would heal the parts that matter.

I sometimes hope my love could defy reality, but I know that my inability is for the better. There would be no more need for time. There would be no more point in it all. It is better like this, to take time in it all.

Wounds take time to heal.Ā And love, instead of making it go away, can help alleviate the pain.

I wish to do the same.

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poems, random, written

Could Haves

I could have picked up that dead bird on the street and set it aside.
I could have stopped myself from viewing porn so that there’s no more need to hide.
I could have just stopped writing and drew more instead.
I could have waited until after college to get a boyfriend.
I could have kept my old course and suffer all four years not wanting it.
I could have saved my first kiss instead of wasting it.
I could have tried more food instead of being picky.
I could have eaten more healthily so I wouldn’t be too sickly.
I could have brought a towel to wipe my sweat on my way to school.
I could have stopped eating two extra spoonfuls since I was already full.
I could have waited for another day.
I could have thought of what I wanted to say.
I could have concluded this poem with this line right now.
Instead I continue, ending it, but no idea how…

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poems, thoughts, written

What Happened Last Night

tired.
this might will become a problem.
always tired.
never having enough rest.
the other never knowing when
this will end.

sleep.
an important thing to do.
but sometimes,
it gets ahold of you;
little by little, sleep creeps
all over you.

dreams.
you rest just fine.
countless stars in your
subconscious sky
no worries at all;
just waking up.

awaken.
you realize that you
forgot someone important.
you left him in the real world
while you fell asleep.
he waited.

wait.
all night, all night.
need to know you’re okay.
i might go crazy.
but i need to wait
before doing anything.

worry.
the following morning,
when the light enters your eyes
you wait for the right time
to call
and check if he’s alright.

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poems, random, thoughts, written

General Things

We’re both in the same place,
both in the same time
but that might not be enough;
you have to be more specific.

Moving in the same Earth,
breathing the same air,
but that’s not enough for me —
you have to be more specific.

We know the same people,
speak the same language,
but there are other factors to consider;
you have to be more specific.

We might be on the same page,
but we’re not on the same book.
It’s not enough that we’re in the same library —
you have to be more specific.

We’re under the same sky,
seeing the same stars,
but I don’t think that’s enough to reach you;
you have to be more specific.

Being general about your existence
helps in giving us – giving me – hope
that there’s a chance, but how can we be sure?
You have to be more specific.

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poems, random, written

i’m not

i’m not who you think i am

i’m not shy in front of others

i’m not quiet like i usually say so

i’m not nice like i “normally” am

i’m not someone you can rely on

i’m not someone you can trust

i’m not someone you can go to in times of trouble

i’m not warm like the rest

i’m not cute like the rest

i’m not beautiful like the rest

i’m not talented; i can’t do anything right

i’m not with you anymore

i’m not happy now

i’m not feeling that sad

i’m not who you think you are

i’m not you

i am myself

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